Use All the Pretty Things
After our mom died my sister and I were together at our family home and for the first time ever, we dug deep into mom’s cedar chest. Her “hope chest,” as they’re sometimes called. The chest had been our grandmother’s- I remember it at the foot of her bed- and now it was at the foot of the bed that had been my parents, and whatever hopes the chest held were left behind for others, left behind for my sister and me.
There were a few things in the chest we recognized, but much of it were treasures we had never seen. Among them: a long, fine, white cotton nightgown with beautiful handwork at the neckline and short sleeves; a colorful woven shawl- not at all my mom’s style- but beautifully made and likely a gift to her from someone special, or it wouldn’t have been in the chest. There were piles of folded handmade lace, a few were actual doilies, steeped in the scent of age. There was mom’s childhood doll; a dress she wore when she was about three; and some sweet holiday-themed guest towels that I remember in rotation in the 80’s, but I hadn’t seen since.
And then there was a quilt, primarily made in bright pink and white, with squares featuring girls- side view, in bonnets and hoop dresses, holding parasols. The quilt was stunning and neither my sister nor I knew anything about it- who made it, how our mom obtained it, who it was intended for. The quilt, however beautiful, also didn’t quite match the decor of the house, or perhaps it would have been in use. Nonetheless, that night I placed it on the bed in my childhood room and lost myself in the study of the girls in the squares, wondering about the sweet fabrics their dresses were made from. What had they been before: ladies or girls dresses? aprons? cloth napkins? I would never know, but each was a dream for my my textile loving heart.
I told my sister that discovering the quilt inspired a new motto for me- unlikely a phrase I made up- but which popped into my mind as I placed it on my bed: use all the pretty things. Don’t hide them away or save them for special occasions, use them every day. Because life is too short to surround ourselves with objects and possessions that don’t fill the void of and need for beauty, in a world so filled with plastic and utilitarian, with tech devices and machine-made everything. Using all the pretty things can be a bridge to our ideal lives, or even more simply make us feel happy for the moment we are drinking tea from a beautiful cup, or slipping into a cashmere sweater to do the laundry.
The Holiday Season is absolutely the time to use all the pretty things, especially this pandemic year when we might be isolated at home and only entertaining ourselves or our immediate families. This year of all is the one to use grandma’s china instead of Chinet; to wear our fanciest dress on Christmas Eve or New Year’s Eve; to steam-press cloth napkins for each place setting on the table; to splash out the jewelry, be it costume or real. Use ALL the damn pretty things and be joyous doing it. A caution here not to buy new things, simply use the pretty things we already have. And don’t create “postable” scenes and photos just to be seen; this defeats the purpose of appreciating the beauty in our own surroundings. Do it because- as I mentioned before- life is too short to abide the unpleasant or the ugly, and a chest or a drawer or a cupboard filled with beautiful things is like the proverbial light that should not be hidden.
Let your hope shine, use all the pretty things, and have the most beautiful of holidays.
